Savvy Toddler Mom

I’ve been slammed with work since last week — even over the weekend (grrr…) — so just a few thoughts for today. 

1) Sunscreen.  It’s freakin’ hot already here in Utah (102 degrees on Friday!), and the toot would be lobster-red without his sunscreen every couple of hours.  Always put sunscreen on your kids when they play outside, whether it’s sunny or cloudy.  Apply, then reapply.  The nuisance is definitely worth not having them get skin cancer.

2) Early Book Review. I just started reading “Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child” by John Gottman.  I’m only 20 or so pages into it, but really, really enjoying it.  Several times today I was able to put Gottman’s theories to the test with positive results.  Recommended by a therapist friend of mine (who said she’s glad Gottman wrote it, because otherwise she would have had to…), it’s all about teaching your children to be comfortable expressing their emotions and having them learn how to cope with emotionally-charged situations.  I’ll let you know my final verdict after I finish reading and some real-world application. 

However, I keep thinking about a childhood experience where my mom and I were shopping for underwear (I think I was seven or eight) and she wouldn’t let me get the kind I wanted.  No explanation, no empathy.  Just “no,” and then got mad at me for being upset about it.  (I think I wanted Strawberry Shortcake or something…)  I’m sure there was a reason: cost, quality, etc., but she didn’t try to explain it.  I just remember her being MEAN because she wouldn’t let me get whatever it was.  A mean mom.

Gottman argues that parents should validate their children’s feelings, let them express them, give them a name (sad, angry, disappointed), and then learn to cope with those feelings and move on.  I wish my mom had put her arm around me and said, “I know you want to get those.  They would be really fun, wouldn’t they?  Unfortunately, [her reason here] and I’m so sorry we can’t.”

It would have made all the difference in the world. 

3) Potty Training.  This is the one I’m the most excited about.  The toot has shown little interest so far in the little potty we placed in “his” bathroom several months ago.  It might as well just be a step stool. 

Some days I’ll get ambitious and ask him if he wants to sit on it.  The answer is usually “no.”  Sometimes he’ll actually do it for a minute to humor me… first, fully clothed, then he would actually let me take his clothes and diaper off.  Lately, we have been asking him before his bath if he wants to sit on it — just to keep it on his radar.  He usually says, “no.”  My pediatrician said not to even bother potty training until he’s three — he’ll just do it when he’s ready, she says. 

Well, tonight I was getting him ready for his bath and asked him if he’d like to sit on the potty.  I nonchalantly added that if he went “tinkle” (the word I have chosen for this bodily function) in the potty, I would give him a car.  He’s really been into doing anything for a Matchbox-sized character from Cars.  Would you believe that the kid sat down and tinkled like a pro?  I couldn’t.  I absolutely could not believe it.  What a big boy!

Unfortunately, I don’t think I can afford to keep up the potty training program with cars as a reward, so I’m going to have to try another tactic pretty quick.  I am just thrilled to know that he “gets it” and can do it on command, if he so chooses.  Wow.

4) Funny words.  I have to share a couple of funny things the toot said to me today:

• When I asked him if we should get him some chocolate milk: “Good idea, Mommy!”
• To a couple of things I said today: “Okie dokie”
• When we were calling SavvyDad on the phone: “I can’t wait!”

What a crack-up.

Back to the salt mines for me… I’d love to know about any potty training stories or tips that anyone has.  It’s a whole new adventure waiting for us, I’m sure.